Cell Phones In The Classroom

Mike Archie was the type of teacher that absolutely everyone, himself included, could not wait until he retired.  He was a physical education teacher at a middle school who had clearly smelled too many locker room aromas and no longer had any passion for kids or athletics.  He was simply a crabby old man who students hated, and colleagues avoided. 

This particular incident took place in early 2000s when cell phones were just beginning to become an item that every person owned.  Schools predictably were unsure where to go with the whole cell phone thing and defaulted to the stock approach to all things unknown- prohibit them.  Students caught with cell phones had the phones confiscated and were subjected to possible disciplinary action as well.

One thing crabby old teachers who need to retire are excellent at is dispensing discipline according to the handbook.  No gray area or breaks with this group!  So when Mike saw Cordero Williams holding a cell phone, he was on him like flies on shit.  Rather than ask the kid to put the thing away, he charged up the bleachers of the gymnasium in a fashion that might suggest that this phone threatened the safety of the President of the United States. "Gimme that phone Williams!" 

Most tough guy middle schoolers generally don't enjoy confrontation with adults.  Cordero became visibly upset and pleaded with his teacher that the phone wasn't even real.  Mike would have none of it, and snatched the phone out of his hands, and dragged the kid out of the gym and down to the Dean's Office.

Mike's anger at this offense was obvious by the way he filled out the discipline referral.  He pressed so hard I'm amazed the pen didn't break, and are five exclamation points ever really necessary?  When he was done, he taped the cell phone to the referral and noted below it, "Student tried to tell me the phone wasn't real!!!!!"  With that, he placed the referral in the dean's box and left Cordero to wait, fully embarrassed from the experience of getting dressed down by a teacher and dragged out of class in front of his peers. 

When the Dean of Students returned, he read the referral and examined the phone taped to the paperwork.  The 'phone' was actually a piece of chocolate with foil wrapping colored to look like a phone.  I couldn't make this up.  A three year could have told you this wasn't a real phone.  Hell, anyone could.  Well, anyone except Mike Archie.